Judge

Judging?? Who dun judge? Being judge is definitely not good, sometime what you think of others is not the reality. In fact, you just ruin the whole thing. Or maybe not judge, its biased. Just being biased against us?? Maybe?? Oh well, just go with the flow then. Just hate the unfairness treatment. Maybe in life, nothing is fair and we should not even expect fairness from others. Just like what people say "Different people different treatment" get what it means.I'm giving very little hope in everything, lesser hope lesser disappointment. Well, life will be better.... everything will be fine....

Being alone is also a happiness!!

Actually sometimes I do love being alone because I can do all the silly things and entertain myself. Haha!! It's a bit stupid but dun you think sitting in the bus with a piece of earpiece is what all we need? Enjoy the music, being quiet and reflect on things is something I always do. On top of that, SHOPPING!! I did shop alone and enjoy FOOD!!! Sounds like forever alone, haha, but no, I have bunch of friends too!! Babras!!! <3

Learn!

Opps... It been long!! For the past few years, things have changed a lot for me. I realised that in life, we have to learn and change for the better. Although at times we might have difficulties but we have to faced and overcome it. I can't deny the fact that I do run away from problems but after doing all this, things are still not solve and we are just letting continue its own way. Hiding away from your problem do help you to avoid the things that you didn't want or painful to face , however we have to come back to reality. Pick up the courage and do the thing that you its right. Dun add on another 'regret' in your life.
Personally, I believe in myself. I believe that only you yourself can make things different. I have gone through lots of up and down, each time, I learn something. Every setback that we face make us grow stronger and as everytime we grow stronger, it forces us to be more optimistic toward our problems. Well, stay strong each time and never give up whenever something hits upon you.

Seriously, what's life for? what for working hard,always trying to hold it on? GOD, why my life have to be control? Why are you so cruel to me? Did I do anything wrong to get such treatment or is it I deserve it? Even my own learning environment have to be control and force? Then what for I go home early? just to see your face or just to be control? JUST FUCK MY LIFE, it was my first time using such harsh word,but i seriously…… 

No one on earth can bring me out from here, no one can help me, no one can protect me,no one can understand it. NO ONE! Do they even bothers? Do they even cares about me studies? They dont even praise me for doing well, not even once in my whole life time. Is that a moltivation for me? They dont even know how's my doing. He is being selfish. While, Ive no choice. I swear to myself to be independence and i dun need them. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!! HAVE A BLAST!!!<3>

HEY!!!! I wanted to write one last post for this year before it end:) Well, it was a great year no matter what had happen. I still cherish this year and will learn from thing that I've done wrong or even things that i didnt do wrong. We just have to learn from everything:) I still feel very bless and fortunate that god is watching me, this year academic achievement still not bad(top 25%) more than happy. And also got $$$CASH$$$ to take, teehee^^. 

WOW WOW, next year??? SCARY~~~ O's!!!! Well, still gonna work hard uh. Scare i regret:) 

Well, Memories down the year with them<3>

BABRAS<3>

THE PHOTO BOMBERS

SHOOTING CLUB

PIG, only know how to eat n sleep :p

CAMBODIAN!!!:p

Just wanna wish them a happy new year and hope that next year will be even better from them. Love ya!!!!<3>

 

Hello!!!! Its been so long,yeah! well, GOOD NEWS!!! my com was fixed!!! Last month, just went to Cambodia for school trip. Wow… Ive start missing those kids and all the memories there. Great time with the cuties-Miyean,Grace,lst,Maifeng,Darryl and Hazim(ha ba gou):p They are just so lovely and wonderful.And yeah, Ive got my new sister mo niang!!!OMG, SHE'S SOOOO CUTEE!!! still remember during camp,those time when we were playing with those kids.
  Look how pure and innocent they are. Their smiles and laughter…. It just give me an indescrible feeling.Come to think of it how blessed me were,having such great care from our parents, things are so much hygienic as compared to them. And look at them, the just run around outside naked, picked up things from the ground and without washing their,they went to have their food. Water is also very precious to them, they dun pour the whole bottle of water instead they drip drop by drop to kill the red ants. All the hardship in building the court for them,etc are all worth it. Just LOVE THEM!!! I'll post some photos on the other day and that shall be it.:) 
                                      
                                               My love with lst

                                                      CUTIES!!!

                                     

                                           YAY!!! After everything!!! GO Go go Greenridge!!!

The little girl? yeah!! This MO NIANG!!!!

photo credit: Miyean!!! (my homestay buddy!!!!)

Wait…… I wanted to share two songs before i go… :)

關心妍-終點

Try - Pink (Jayesslee Cover)

Jayesslee is just too awesome, yeah!!! 

Alright,SORRY SORRY!!! It's been soooo sorry since my last post. I was busy with my studies and all that and also my mac got problem!!! T_T sad life. I've not touch my comp for soooo longggg and today i finally try using it, just hope that it will be Look at the cute girl at the LEFT!!!! I just love her sooo much can? Haha sounds weird yeah! But she's really counted as my very best f!!!! :) While my results??? okok uh :) Manage to fail chem by two marks this time round. Quite disappointed,1st time fail chem :( Nvm, we have to face failure as we go by, yeah!! Had a very memorable day with my BAO BERRR XUEEERRR!!!! <3 The Halloween Night at USS!!!! I just loved those time spending with her. The "ZOMBIES" that we've cross by and all those Haunted houses!!! My les partner that day!!! <3 Look at the cute girl at the LEFT!!!! I just love her sooo much can? Haha sounds weird yeah! But she's really counted as my very best friend which is at the very top rank. We have been together for THREE years!! And i will always remember the way we first talked to each other, greetings and being together <3 All the memories is so memorable!!! She is really so called my very best friend, no one can beat her yeah!! Please remember BAO BERR!!! you ISN'T and NEVER will be a subsitution u know?? You are very IMPORTANT to me ok? I had always been cherishing our friendship!!!! Please dun think it that way :( BAO BERR i love you sooo much!! (not trying to be a les).

Well, i seriously hate people who misunderstand others. If all u want to do is to assume, so be it but you dun have the right to hurt someone, Maybe the friendship is just too fragile. Its not like all of us have known each other for years and our friendship is always strong, thats what i thought but maybe I'm wrong? 

Well, maybe i shouldnt care about it or even bother to do something about it. I think i should just jolly well follow what they want, their mood and thinking. Its not like just one person that said that. Or is it i should just follow whatever you all think to make you guys happy? I cant have my own thinking uh? Hais... i shouldnt care la, to make every single happy is not easy so why not just make my life simple if i really cant acheive it. 

Hais.... these days were seriously crappy, someone from other school contact me and started saying all those mushy words. Hey please, although i know u but can u just stop sending all those..... I told u "FRIENDS", dont u understand what is the meaning of FREINDS? Stop making be that bad person again please, u will not know how torturing to be in that position. It can really make u go crazy and just tear every night. I will just be very cold to u if u continue with that, friends i dun mind. I know i should learn from my mistake so please let me go...... I dun want to hurt u. 

 Shall listen to music!!! old song but awesome one<3 font="font">
手放开- 李聖傑

 Those time sharing music!!! This is a old but nice song. :)

为什么相爱的人不能在一起

WTF!!!! The moment i step in my house in the afternoon, i thought everything is in peace but i was wrong!!! Can you all just kill me la, stop me from all this CRAP!! It's like my family gonna..... My Mum just walk off like that and called my Dad, telling him that She's not coming back any more. What do u mean by that huh??? Can u please dun be like that. It's also hurting of us ok?? 

Currently both my parent not all home and it just give me an insecure feeling:( MUMMY!! DADDY!!! PLEASE.... I BEG YOU TO STOP THE FIGHT OK?? PLEASE..... I really want to tell them this, but hais... I dun wanna let them see me in this state, they have problems too. Well, i shall just bear it ba. Just FML la!!! Seriously August is the worst month I could ever get. The amount of tears drop is countless, I HATE IT!!! Well, nobody will know how i feel right now. SUX!!! I really feeling scared, afraid that my family will..... FML!!!

Alright!! finally exam is over and i dun have to be so stress every single day. Well stress really kills, I've been trying very hard to control my emotions these few days to the extend that I'm talking to myself :x Anyway its a way to keep myself calm. 

Ok I'm quite TIRED today, 1 hour of sleep and woke up at 2.00am because of my parent:( It's normal for parent to quarrel but why did u used the word divorce? Both of them should calm down and settle tgt right? Or maybe one day you will regret on that solution, well everything is fixed, can't do anything alr. 

It's like u don't know how i feel at that moment maybe u thought I didnt hear but i just have lots of things running through. Really can't sleep after that instead studying in the dark because i can't switch on the light as they're sitting outside on the sofa!!! I really dun know what to do and also havent finish studying but the only thing i can do is to wait. This 3 hours are seriously terrible for me...... Yet 5 o clock start to prepare and head of to school to study. 

I have the feeling that i will fail chem but if i really do, I'm will......:( First time failing. Hais... let god do his work ba. Went home earlier today, Ive  nothing to do in school and that I'm tired. Gonna really wish Sheryl RuiYan and Carina all the very best of the bloody A Math paper tmr!!! Urrggg.... really tired,shall take a mini rest ba. Bye;)

那些年 - (胡夏 - Hu Xia)

Hais.... I'm having that freaking headache at this moment?? what the hell... Gonna quickly do that poa notes or i scare i wont have the time. Gonna hang on yeah!!! One subject that I'm well prepared is CHEM!!!!! yay!!!! .................. .......... prepare to fail. Good luck uh.

 Please.....  Stop crying every silence night, stop thinking of _____. To stop the pain, i have to _____ myself, its pain but its still better thn that. I doesnt want to _____ but i cant resist it. I will do anything if I cant take it anymore. Well, no one knows how i feel rn. But at this silent night, i heard my heartbeat. I ask it, can you stop the beating?? I have enough. Walking down the pathway, i heard that song and my ____ drops. I told you not to tell but you did, i've said that i dun know how to face _____ , It just turn out worst. Stop the torture. If only studies can really make me forgot but I was wrong. 

「聽」到他的聲音，你會「看」到歌中的世界 「看」到他的歌，你會進入他的創作生命 「進入」到他的音樂故事，你會感受有股莫名的力量，直擊你的心臟！！

壞人

I'm tired, really very tired......

 can i just end myself???

Maybe you just dun treat me as a friend anymore, well I've nothing to say. It's your choice, but i just hope to substain the friendship. Until you talk to me ba, or maybe never? I really dun know. Just make me feel worst. Fine, but I'm still willing to help you in anything. Studies. 

Have i finally got an answer?? Arrrggg..... i feel like screaming!!!!!!!! Why am i always keeping things to myself???? why Can't i share???!!! What is holding on to me???!!! Kill myself can???!!!STOP IT!!!!!

Omg, what happen to me??? So tired today yeah. burying myself with music. Music is always my bestfriend. Happy, angry, sad, lonely Just listen to music. Singing helps too. Well, every music tells different story, we need to understadn the story behind it and sing along the beat, yeah! I'm just living in that world.  MUSIC LIFE

Having mood swing?? i dun no. Maybe is because I'm not feeling well ba. Everything just pissed me off, maybe in this situation? Have been doing homework since afternoon and at least i manage to finish so that i dun have the burden on my shoulder tmr. 

Hais... ask me the same question again??  I just want to tell you that I've been telling you the truth, but i think you believe me at all, I'm speechless, i dun know how to ans ur question because whatever i tell you, you dun even believe, so what can i say??? If you choose to believe others then so be it la. Why bother asking me? 

Am i a ball??

Seriously have enough ok? Please la, you dont even know a single thing and you start thinking of all those craps. seriously..... People here trying to solve. Fine! i dun bother how you gonna think, be it true or not. Go on... i dun care!!! I think i shouldn't have bother to explain either. If you dun bother to make a different why should i?? I Dun find a need to. Everyone have a limit ok? WHATEVER LA!!! Do whatever you want!!

AHHhhh!!!! My mother come in the wrong time!!!!! She is here when i really feel like crying!!!!!! Why you do this to me??? Just live me alone. This is what I'm going to say, You just don't understand and i think you will never get to understand. It wasnt all what you think and what u see. But what-so-ever, I'm someone that wont tell you anything or wont take initiative. So whatever it is, be it whether or not i regret, I'll rather choose to suffer than to say out. I will bury myself with books and study hard!!!!! I wont think... and i'm not going to tell you this.

My awesome BRO!!! <3

Ok, the handsome guy beside which is my bro shall be one of my topic today!!:) He is a very good bro, really concern about me. He is a very sweet guy although sometime very annoying, THIS IS HIM.<3 I still love him even though. I will never forget what he did for me and bully me when i'm young. JK.Maybe he have only one sister and i also only have one bro which is him, thats why we're so close. But if one day, i would have to leave this world, the only thing that i want to tell him is that he is the BEST bro i've ever met and i love him very much. Not going to tell him this now but one day......


I suddenly feels that my parent really very caring,although ya, sometimes there's some misunderstanding but its normal isn't it? They are still the most important people in our life, they are the one that really love and care about us. They want the best for us. Be grateful that we still have them.<3Cant imagine if one day i lost them, what will i do? Not gonna think about it.


I really feel very blessed to have so many friends and my family with me, so what's more do i ask for? I'm contented. Although having so many friends may be a scary thing but at least i know who are the one that i can rely on, and just one will do. I just don't understand why there's betrayal in some friendship? What do they want from others? Don't you find a pity to cheat on someone that really believe in you?  I will really feel very sad to lose friendship.

 I always find friendship  is a very mysterious bond between human because is like its a fate for you to meet someone vs so many people in the world. So this is what god's plan. He is the one that leads everything but whether or not its sustain, its all depend on you and the other party. So isn't it sad to end it? DEFINITELY!! So I'm gonna cherish my friendship even if i know that they are just trying to make us of me, i know i can protect myself. Just stay happy, always smile and everything will be easier to work.

Friday, we just got our Exam timetable. Wow, just less than a month and we're going to take our examination. This year past real fast, few months seems like few days. Next year it will be worst, my Bro had been scaring me this few days, don't be so evil can? Nvm, its ok. 400++ days to our O levels, so nearrrrr.... Why CT2 5 days only? Can you just give us more time to study? The last day of the exam, E1 and E2 still have A math from 3-4pm thn Sheryl still have Cca :( Nvm la anyway i feel that birthday is the day when Mothers when through all those pain to bring their beloved child into this world, so we should be thankful to our mother on our birthday. MUM!!! I LOVE YOU!!!! <3<3

一個人不可能 

DING DANG!!!! This is one of the songs that tells her story.....

                                  being crazy


Currently at RUIYAN Baoberr,,,, 's house. She is going through pain and what i can do is just look at her, i cant go inside her stomach and help her right? I only i can. I DUN NO WHAT TO DO!!! Just now went to Sheryl babe's house for E learning, quite productive but also having fun. Hahaaaa.... ok. What should i do now??? Dun no. 


The above photo were taken in Yannie's house using my com cos i really have nth better to do. Should i watch movie??? Ok la, i sounds stupid, talking to myself but well, entertainig myself ma. teehee:)


Haiyo, i really dun no what to say le, wait wait.... wait till i thought of something to post or say thn i blog again. BYE ;)

The only way for me to stop thinking of all those problems is to stare in the air, sounds a bit weird but this is what i do. Omg, I've make myself sounds retarded. OK. Although this only last for a min or even less but at least i was able stop myself from thinking too much. The moment i stare in the air, I will feel that I have not burden, no stress, no problems. Its just make me feel like Im a very free and easy person which i can be very happy everyday. Well, please get back to reality.....

I just love the time spending with Lst during Geo lesson, Is like the only time that i can be with her and the only time we started singing to each other, recalling all those songs that we didnt hear or sing for long. Then we will started to look at each other when we forgot the lyric and then both of us will be laughing at each other when we recall it at the same time. Last few days during Geo lesson, we suddenly remember a song which we've forgot the first part of the lyric. This song was sang by 

王心凌– 下一頁的我. This is the song which i remember Lst and i was working very hard to memorise the lyric together (last yr) during recess or after school. But not bad la, we actually took 3 days to memorise it. 

王心凌 –下一頁的我

就  要  出  发   是  吗   这  问  题 困  扰  着  我
是  个 可 能   吧   或  许 想    太  多
有  的 梦   不 去 做  好  可 惜

我 害  怕 吗   有  点     孤 单  很  痛   的 对  不 对
我 得 放   下    翻  开  这  一 页   没  时  间   想    过  去
心  中    会  怕 才  问  自 己   那 些  曾   经   的 话  语谢  谢  是  你 让   我 有  天   空   和 明   天     学  会  独 立
站   在  未  知  的 泥 土 里   看  我 勇   敢  的 深   呼 吸
黑  的 夜   我 不 怕   天   空   很  大   像    在  说     不 能   哭
下  一 页 的 我   会  去 哪 里   用   多  大 的 勇   气所  有  梦   里 面   的 风   雨   我 不 怕 那 是  我 的 试  题
下  一 页 的 我   希 望   能   拥   有    美  丽 的 明   天
所  以 这  次 我 送   走  从   前     因  为  我   看  的 见
担  心  什   麽   去 吧   爱 让   人  哭 真   对  不 起之  前   的 回  忆   握 在  掌    心  里
它 让   我   再  苦 也 肯  努 力

耳 边   的 风     吹   吧   让   我 听   见   新  消   息
在  旅 途 上      爱 是  氧   气   让   我 越  来  越  肯  定
心  中    会  怕 才  问  自 己   那 些  曾   经   的 话  语谢  谢  是  你 让   我 有  天   空   和 明   天     学  会  独 立
站   在  未  知  的 泥 土 里   看  我 勇   敢  的 深   呼 吸
黑  的 夜   我 不 怕   天   空   很  大   像    在  说     不 能   哭
下  一 页 的 我   会  去 哪 里   用   多  大 的 勇   气所  有  梦   里 面   的 风   雨   我 不 怕 那 是  我 的 试  题
下  一 页 的 我   希 望   能   拥   有    美  丽 的 明   天
所  以 这  次 我 送   走  从   前     因  为  我   看  的 见
寓 言  藏   在  我 心  中      相    信  它 吧   往   前   冲我 的 路   我 就  一 定   让   它 走  成    幸   福
那 些  作  了 的 梦   忘   了 吗   那 些  万  分  之  一 的 也 许
不 用   说     我 还  是  我   约  定   怎  样   寂 寞 也 不 能   哭
看  吧   下  大 雨 也 不 认  输    请   让   我   学  长    大
下  一 页 的 我   会  去 哪 里   用   多  大 的 勇   气所  有  梦   里 面   的 风   雨   我 不 怕 那 是  我 的 试  题
下  一 页 的 我   希 望   能   拥   有    美  丽 的 明   天
所  以 这  次 我 送   走  从   前     因  为  我   看  的 见

所  有  梦   里 面   的 风   雨   我 不 怕 那 是  我 的 试  题
下  一 页 的 我   希 望   能   拥   有    美  丽 的 明   天
所  以 这  次 我 送   走  从   前     因  为  我   看  的 见

I always tend to do some thinking and reflection on myself and also knowing what I really mean in this world. (which i have never understand) I always ask myself why am i in this world? How am i suppose to spend my life time? What do i really want? Who am i? Do i understand myself? No, i dun understand myself, i dun no what i want, i dun no what I'm for, i dun no what i really like/dislike , i dun no what is my purpose of living , i just dun no everything. Failure in life. Hope I'm not thinking too much.

Just like the song lyirc above that says:
下  一 页 的 我   会  去 哪 里

ya, i really dun no where i will be going. Hoping that life is still a happy one:) 

站   在  未  知  的 泥 土 里   看  我 勇   敢  的 深   呼 吸
黑  的 夜   我 不 怕   天   空   很  大   像    在  说     不 能   哭

I'm really standing at a unknown place, i dun know where i am, where is a place that belongs to me. But that is what i should tell myself ,to be strong. Well, this song lyric really speaks everything.  

I've been through lots of problem these few days yeah, Hais in term of friends, studies....... Well, what to do, life still goes on. I've learn how to be more optimistic, when i meet any problem just smile and tell urself to be strong "everything will be alright" God will help you, when he knows u are sufforcating, he will open a window for u to breathe. 

Is a friendship really that hard to last?? Hais, I really dun no. Everything is just a dream to me. I dun no why i will always feel very hurt to see my friends being sad. Sometime i will thought of whether if im like that, will i be taken for granted? Or will i be just a toy for people to 'play' with?? I hope im not thinking too much. 

I find myself very bad, is like we have been neglecting people around us. Im so sorry. I will spend more time on you ok? I know in class you will feel a bit left out, but my dear i'll try not to let u have this feeling ok? I will be with you. I know you have been through lots of things too but what i want to tell you is that You're not along babe? I will always stand beside and support you. 

In life, there are many things that we are unexpected and we cant do anything about it, so just stay strong and do not let people see your own weaknesses, or they will only harm you. We have to protect ourself, i have understand that whatever things that we do, we cannot depend on other people, we just have to depend on yourself because if u give ur trust and one day u no that ur friend actually betrayed you, this is the time where you will only be very hurt by them therefore this is one of the way to protect urself from getting hurt again. 

LLBBQ!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!<3

I really dun know why people just like to think so much, anyone know the story behind it??? Nah, you dun even no so what are you thinking about?? Trust your gut instinct over spreadsheets. There are too many variables inthe real world that you simply can't put into a spreadsheet. Spreadsheets spit out results from your inexact assumptions and give you a false sense of security. In most cases, your heart and gut are still your best guide. This is what i told myself, everything i do,just follow my heart but sometime things are not as easy as abc. You will definitely have to been through something to make you a better person. I just hope to be a better person cause i want the people around to be happy.

Well, today was my Bao berrr.... LLBBQ MAVIS<3 Birthday!!!! Actually yesterday i spend quite a time to think of how to make her birthday a memorable one but somehow the Timing was not right ar, most of them were having CCA and she is not free in the night. I was very sorry if her birthday celebration was simple cause we really dun have the time but i really hope that she enjoyed and felt happy for all those surprise that we did for her and COCKROACH. My muscle was already aching after running so much but,however, Its still worth it la. As long as she like it. Wow! Her first time eating ice cream with us. Great time together<3<3 But can i say something?? She was quite scary when she have mood swing... Opps...:x But i still love her la<3<3<3 I'll never forget her!!!!

Today is 3/7 DAY!!!!! HAPPY 3/7 DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Had a small chat with Sheryl, my bao berr... just now before we started doing our homework. We started chatting about things and I reflected on the issue. Actually she really have similiar things happening as me, even her feelings. I can really share n talk to her, just love her so much<3<3 She can always understand me. Both of us have the mindset that every relationship won't last, i'm really scare to be in a relationship cause maybe insecure??? or i just scare to be hurt?? I just have no trust in it. I just need a guy to change my mindset. It's hard to find a faithful guy but i hope i will be the lucky one to find it:) Ok la, now what i want is to study la, I really hope to do well in O's but somehow a bit slack. No no cannot like that. I have to work hard JY!!!!!! As for relationship, i put it aside first la. After O's ba or when i guaduate. Whether i like or not, friends first. I 've no choice, i dun want to be selfish. I agree with what sheryl say, whether or not to give them ans is not important at all, is all about the time. Soo... study ba!!!! <3<3

There always sun shine to brighten up your day and life, hope this sun shine will brighten up Everyone's life!!!

Well, i guess i've been lieing to myself. I dun mind hurting myself but i dun wan to hurt anyone. yeah, study first....  but i really hope to substain it, i have experience this lots of times. And everything change . I really feeling very sorry and there u said "thank you for everything", making me guilty ar. Maybe one day i will tell u or maybe not (i shall see). I dun no anything, maybe i just dun wan to think or i really dun no but i know i have many people around me that willing to help. On phone with Sheryl<3 for long yesterday nite, she knows and understand everything even my feelings and i know I can really share everything to her. Well everything is over and i really hope you will be happy and alright! 

This blog is just for me to say whatever things that when by and some things n feeling that i didnt say. well, this is just only purely for me and so im going to write my real thoughts. TEEHEE... 

Well, afterall i just found out that regardless how many friends you have in life. They definitely cant be compared to just one trueful and understand best friend. Everyone will only leave you one day, even the one that was the closest with you. So why bother?! Its just nothing. 

I remember it well that u say u wont, but look what happen in the end?! Well, i cant do anything anyway. Whatever happen in future, just stay strong and be brave to carry on. Its not the end, alright? 逃避不一定躲的過, 面對不一定最難受. 

我寂寞寂寞就好。。这时候谁都别来安慰或拥抱。。就让我一个人痛­到受不了想到快疯掉。。死不了就还好。。

U just dun care and why should i dun even bother.I dun tell anyone about it but............. I JUST DUN WANT TO SAY. Fine fine fine. Im fine ok?

What is the problem with you??? There's something. Never understand, never will. Why do people want to assume? Do u just love assuming? can't just ask? So not gonna do anything cause im not that type. Don't force me to do something which i dun wish to do please, i really dun want. Well, i dun want to think of anything right now. I just wanna have a very good rest and forget everything. What i hope now is that i did not dissapoint Mr Chock. He's a very good teacher and i know he have put in a lot a lot of effort in our class and he did not give up on us even at the very last few mins. MR CHOCK!! YOU ARE A VERY VERY VERY GOOD TEACHER!!!

I really hate this feeling, this day and this moment. I feel like burying myself right now. I really do not understand why this type of thing have happen to me sooooo many soooo many time. I'm seriously sick and tired, i dun want to face this anymore. I dun care and i dun want to care. How i hope i know nothing, be like those small kids that can live cheerfully and without any stress. I love the moment where i can just stare at the air because it was the only time that i wont be thinking of anything and i dun have to think of it. I THINK I'M SOOOO STUPID, SO NAIVE to...........


Forget it, i dun care.

Hang on....

I just dun understand. I really dun understand. After so much u have been through, after so much hardwork u put in and just because of that small little thing,you give up everything. You will only start ending up hurting those innocent ones. You were in wrong but you just want others to bear the wrong-doing of yours. So what if you try amending, once hurt is always hurt. You cant pretend like nth happen. therefore i just learn that during those hard time, there is always some sweet moment and those sweet moment is for u to persue it. So i will not just because of small issue and cause myself to be unhappy. 

凡事不要想的太复杂，手握的太紧，东西会碎，手会疼。

Hey yo guys!!!! It had been very very very long since my last post. I effing hate this year and im serious. Everything change just after this 2 months of long breaks. I would rather not having the breaks and just continue lesson. I didnt even enjoy my holidays too, so whats the point of having holiday? I cant even enjoy myself, why should i even force myself to be happy when im not. I think my friendship had became worse with all my frens. I dun have that 'feeling' with them.

Hais, what wrong with me? Is the problem lies on me? or its wasnt me? I really wanted to have that answer being told but i think there wasnt any chances now. I think i shouldn't had thought so much, i have to bear it in the end, everything is fated. U wants me to face it, no matter how hard i try to hide from it, i will always face it in the end. No matter what, i will try hard not to think so much, i got to work very hard this year for streaming. I really really have to take PURE SCIENCE!!!!! I must get it!!!!

I dun wanna care everything now, just only my work and no more others, from now on,i will try to get away from interference. ' GET LOSE OF MY SITE NOW!!!! I DUN WANNA SEE U!!!!!!' I very scare this year man, i scare i cant cope in my studies, i scare i will get bad grades. Hear that O level gonna be extreme difficult. OMG!!!! Very very scare. I dun wan!!!!! Everything is happening real fast~~~` i dun have any mental preparation.

Hais, gonna wish myself all the best. Hope ur wishes may come true.
Love lots,bye!!!!

Hey, hi everyone..... Erm... why did u guys act so weird this few days....... Wat really happen? Can u all at least tell me? I really wanna know wat actually happen, i wanna solve the problem but not running away from it. Running away from problem dun really works ok? And when i ask u , u will merely just said NOTHING. R u trying to hide anything or u just dun wanna say? U cant hide anything, as wat i said, im gonna face this soon or later. R u trying to help me or making me feel worse? Seriously i dun even no wat to do, no one is helping me....... FINE ! Lets not tok about it!!!!

Today, get back my report book. Lucky i didn't drop to NA. My position in class is 11/40 n level is 50/161. Heng!!!.... I really feel so scare. Just now went to sheryl's ahma's hos to do the present for RY. Ahhh!!!! TIME IS SERIOUSLY SOOOOO PRECIOUS THR!!!! U gonna rush everything within a time limit. Rushing through everything n even when i reach home, im still feeling so nervous. I dun no why.... haha weird. Carina oso....

Gtg soons...... Byes!!!! Love u guys!!!

AHHH!!!! my result!!!!!
El:C5
Mt: A2
Maths: A1
Science:B3
Geography:A1
History:C6
Literature:C6
Art:B3
DnT:A2

My result not tat goods, especially HISTORY..... What happen? I studied for it n ended out with tis result. Sianz! I hope that i could still remain in express, dun drop pls! I cant afford to drop,seriously. I gonna work hard for MT, tat is not the marks i wanted....... Art oso, i colour so hard, waste my energy.......hmph! I have nth more to post, i guess i shall stop here......
Gtg bye!

Exam coming, I m sooo stress. I hope to give up but i cant....... AHHH!!!! I feel like..... Cant explain. Monday, his n math, i had not prepare yet, i scared i will fail, i really scare i will drop to NA. HELP ME!!!! I really nid help!!!! LINXUAN u have to work hard, u cant fail ok? Jia you jia you jia you!!!! U can do it.....

IM SO CONFUSE!!!!! I dun no wat to do...... Really so sorry!!!!

Hiiiiiii....... Today very hardworking, update blog sia! Haha. SURPISINGLY huh? Ok! Today slp till very late sia. Cool, very long never slp so late le, Love it.♥ Then Prepare and went out...... Went to Parkway Parade to have our lunch, streamboat,cool......... Didnt give it for long too! After our lunch, we have a walk in the mall.

My mother and father suddenly quarrel cos a very small matter, I juz dun understand y adult likes to make thg big instead of smalll, werid isnt it? I was the middle-man, didnt no wat to do,Hais. Adult quarrel, children suffer. UNDERSTAND! Doubt u will understand it.I real hate ppl to quarrel......All the way home is speechless.........

Reach home, use my com. Till 6 plu ba, really nth to do, did finish my homework on Friday alr.The mayb 7 plu gt ppl come to our house n c the house....... Hais, nidda to move out le. I really dun wan, still wanna move to Bukit Panjang estate. HATE IT....... But wat's the point, alr sign le. Currently listen to

张栋梁-明白♥ and chatting wib Muen juz now, now no one cos none of

them wanna chat wif me, So sad!

Nth to write already.K la, Nites! To those wanna slp. Have a early rest ok? Loves♥ everyone always

Yesterday, SCIENCE lesson gt back the paper, 15 1/2, luckily pass sia, i scare fail.Recess tme slack in the classroom, Sheryl n Lst eat their lollipop manz.... haha i still have it with me, from YUANNIEEE...... she give wan ok? I no she very good la..... ♥ Math lesson, Mr Fauzan gib Lst back her test paper then come over,Mr Fauzan help Lst he say Lst act as if she dun no how to do cos she wanna wait Mr Fauzan to come over and help her. Very BHB leh!

Assembly very sian dun no wat act is tat, so i Slp lor... Haha. After scl Hilmi 4 plu then can come n do the PW, so Mavis dun wan to do oso cos she say she very tired. So I stay back with Sheryl and do homework, after tat at around 3.30pm then have our lunch. Sheryl went home after lunch, so I go Lst house. At Fajar ♥ Cool! Then We go Mac and find her fren (Sorry forgot their name.Haha.) to do homework.

I went home and get change and went running with Bro and his fren, Darryl?,FINE. They run very fast sia and their stamina very good, of couse better than me.I always run half way then walk,very sian leh.Wa! very thirsty tat tme.... wanna drink WATER!

TODAY! Cher change back to individual seat, cos a lot of cher complaining tat our class very noisy. Then recess tme, slack in the classroom again,Sian. I lying on the table and listen music ( AI shang ni-By2♥) Ok, dun say about it le. After scl I have lunch wif my dearist Rui Lin and Sheryl, then we went to slack. They went 4 CCA at 2 then meet Lst after her HTM......cool!.

End here..... Love u!

Do u thk i no tat cher will change the ur seat? The problem is even b4 the lesson start, u alr said u wanna change ur seat. Now cher change ur seat alr u not happy. Wat exactly u wan, tell me la! Wan to change u say, dun wan to change oso u say.......very unreasonable.If u wan ask cher to change my seat instead of urs la, i oso dun mind one...... PISSED OFF!!!! Then Zheng fu and Siew tian fight in class, so violent n niosy. I juz wanna peace!

Sheryl as me somethg through phone, then Zheng fu asking telling cher tat we using phone. Luckily, cher nv go to us........ Then after scl, Sheryl,Rui lin and I had our lunch and then go to our secret place to tell each other abt our secret......... After tat, they nidda go attend their cca, so i go home lor, nth to do oso. Met Fouzy at outside the mosque, actually i didnt saw him, is he saw me.Haha. I walk to Pending to take Lrt, cos i dun wan to go home earlier.

At home very bored leh, no one at home. Only left my maid at home and my bro 7 plu then come bck.Hais.... everyone were in bad mood. PLU I today sick. Omg! I wanna ........

Ok! mayb stop here.... teehee..... LX LOVE everyone!!!!

DRAW FOR HALF DAY..... DOING NTH!!!! LOL TAKE FOR FUN.LOL I'M LAME

ZI LIAN LA..... HAHA
Hiie...... A bit sian. Today i very auto dun no y, fine I'm werid anyway. Omg Miss Phua today in class very angry man...... ai ya now term 3 already and ur class score tis kind of marks, of couse will be angry la. If i were Miss Phua i dun even now how to continue to teach. But i now wan to study and concentrate already, but only no how to say, no action...... Hais, still finding a way to study so my marks will improve not getting worst n worst.

Sian leh, PW only Mavis,Hilmi and me do he project only, the others 3 never help even a single thing..... all we do one, i really dun no where to put their name in the credit. Teacher say she no who is doing the project and who is not doing the project, but so wat if she no but did she take any action. 3 people do all the project is time compare to 6 people right..... Can they juz be more auto, dun nid me to tell them wat to do. And our group leader, doesn't act as one of a group leader, he didn't do anythg, juz sit down there. He didn't even guide the group on wat we should do (example: Look for research/ do the power point side.)All we do one, omg i wanna kill them.

Btw HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! to my beloved nu er..... her birthday today. All the best to u. Love u always ttm ok? >

NTH TO POST LIAO!!!! POST ANOTER TIME OK, I NO SURE VERY LONG ONE HAHA........

BB